X-Rated Sugar Cookies (NSFW)

A friend of mine recently threw a Passion Party.  For those who don’t know, a passion party is a place for females to get together and discreetly purchase sex toys, massage oils, etc.  Since this party was taking place at said friend’s home, we decided to each make something.  My friend made boob cupcakes (I’m including a photo of those below) while I decided to make penis cookies.  X-rated?  Yes.  Difficult?  No.  This is a basic sugar cookie recipe.  What gives these cookies their “shape” is a special cookie cutter that you can find at a place like Spencer’s.

  • Ingredients:
  • 2 sticks unsalted butter, room temp.
  • 1 1/2 cups sugar
  • 1 whole egg
  • 1 3/4 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
  • 1 teaspoon almond extract
  • 2 3/4 cups AP flour
  • 1 teaspoon salt
  • special-shaped cookie cutter
  • glitter and/or fondant for decorating
  • corn syrup to get the fondant to stick to the cookies
  1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees F.
  2. In the bowl of a stand mixer, fixed with the paddle attachment, cream the butter with sugar until light and fluffy.
  3. Beat in the egg and the extracts.
  4. In a separate mixing bowl, combine the flour and salt.
  5. Add the flour and salt mixture to the cream and sugar mixture, 1 cup at a time.  Mixing after each addition.
  6. Chill dough in the fridge for 5-10 minutes.
  7. Remove dough from fridge and divide into 2 balls.  On a floured surface, roll each ball into a circle about 12 inches wide and 1/8 inch thick.
  8. Dip cookie cutter in flour then cut your shapes into the dough.
  9. Move the cookies onto a baking sheet (ungreased and NO parchment paper) and bake 6-7 minutes or until cookies are lightly browned (thinner ones take only about 5 minutes so keep an eye on those).

Sugar cookies pre-decoration

 

Next up are decorations.  As you’ll see in my photo below, I decorated some simply with glitter.  Others I decorated with rolled fondant.  You can buy pre-rolled fondant on Amazon for only about $5.  This saves a ton of time and energy and I recommend it, especially if you have never worked with fondant before.

Decorated sugar cookies

 

The slightly sparkly ones that do not have glitter, are the fondant cookies.  The way I got the fondant to stick to the cookies was with the aid of corn syrup.  Any kind will do.  Use a pastry brush to brush the syrup onto the cookie then stick the fondant onto the cookie!  It should dry within 5 minutes or so.

Boobie Cupcakes

 

I had to throw in this photo of my friend’s boobie cupcakes.  These were funfetti cupcakes with icing holding down the fondant.  She used cookie cutters to also cut her fondant (the same method I used for my cookies).  These were both a hit and I think everyone walked away full and happy.

Advertisements
This entry was posted in Baking and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to X-Rated Sugar Cookies (NSFW)

  1. You girls are filthy. Filthy!

Say something

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s